Wot' Cher!

Melody - Charles Ingle, 1891

Albert Chevalier, 1861-1923

Last week down our alley came a toff
Nice old geezer with a nasty cough.
Sees my missus, takes his topper off
    In a very gentlemanly way!
"Ma'am" says he, "I 'ave some news to tell,
Your rich uncle Tom of Camberwell,
Popp'd off recent, which it ain't a sell,
    Leaving you 'is little donkey shay."

Some says nasty things about the moke,
One cove thinks 'is leg is really broke.
That's his envy cos we're carriage folk,
    Like the toffs as rides in Rotten Row!
Straight! it woke the alley up a bit,
Thought our lodger would 'ave 'ad a fit,
When my missus who's a real wit
    Says "I 'ates a Bus because it's low!"
  When we starts the blessed donkey stops
He won't move, so out I quickly 'ops
Pals start whackin' 'm, when down 'e drops
    Someone says 'e wasn't made to go.
Lor, it might have been a fourin' and,
My old Dutch knows 'ow to do the grand
First she bows, and then she waves 'er 'and,
    Callin' out we're goin' for a blow!

Ev'ry evenin' at the stroke of five
Me and the missus takes a little drive.
You'd say, "Wonderful they're still alive"
    If you saw that little donkey go.
I soon showed 'im that 'ed 'ave to do
Just whatever 'e was wanted to,
Still I sha'nt forget that rowdy crew,
    'Ollerin' "Woa! steady! Neddy woa!"

"Wot cher!" all the neighbors cried,
"Who yer gonna meet, Bill
Have yer bought the street, Bill?"
Laugh! I thought I should 'ave died
Knock'd 'em in the Old Kent Road!

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